Survival guide of doing presentation

3 simple hacks guaranteeing you a 100% pass and 80% A

Rule no.1: Be prepared

You may be the greatest speaker in the world (but I am sure that you are not otherwise why the hack you will be reading this stupid entry), however, even Martin Luther King had to prepare for his speech. Generally speaking, there are only two kinds of people who don’t need to prepare for their work. The first kind is those who don’t give shits even they knew they will fuck up; the second type is those who are fucked up. So, the game is simple. When you get the topic then you go home. Stare at it for 2 hours doing nothing and start to write a script for it at 2am in morning. That simple act can save your oral exam already. I used to be a smartass feeling that I don’t need a script for a presentation. That’s why I fucked up every time. Then one day, I decided to write a script and guess what, I got an A that time. You know what? Surviving in a presentation is just like surviving in a zombie apocalypse. Preppers live. Do not underestimate the preparation you do. When you are out there in front of the whole class, anything can happen, literally. You could suddenly laugh so hard that you could not even breathe or your mind is clearer than water. That’s when your preparation can be used.

Rule no.2: Calm the fuck down

As seen in every movie which has people dying, the freak out dude dies first. If you freak out, the audience laughs. When the audience laughs, you freak out. That’s how it works. So you need to convince yourself that you are not freaking out, even if you are. Every time I do presentation I look calm as a lake and actually my legs are shaking literally. Why I can look so not scared? That’s because I have my work done the previous night already. When I know even I am speaking nonsense this moment, the next second I am already backing to my topic. You are actually half a step towards A when other are having a bad time looking at the audience doing nothing.

Rule no. 3: Keep talking

This is the soul of this entry. Remember this. When you really forgot to prepare for your speech or your script is too short, then the trick is keep saying something similar or the same thing in another way round. At the same time, you need to think what you can say later. This trick can only buy you some time but not saving you from this deep shit because to be honest, I have never come across the problem of not having enough content. I only run out of time. However, this rule also implies when you are people like me, those who have too much to say but too less time. When you have a whole lot to say, every second counts. This rule can help you to use every second. Still, if you really have too much to say, cut it short or it can actually get you fail.

So this entry is ended here, if you are having any presentation soon, good luck.

As always, prepare for the apocalypse